the words dont sound right in my head
or in my fingertips
i think i said thank you
i should have said leave
ill probably eat my way into forgetting you
because drinking only makes
it easier to remember
and because
food fills voids
i am
full of incompleteness
when i realize nothing helps the hurt
especially your empty words
of
“do you want to talk about this”
i will run away from the truth
i always do
no, no i dont want to talk
because the words dont feel right in my throat
or in my stomach
the hurt remains as i grow fatter
and weaker
and sadder and sleepier
all these things because
i never learned how to properly say goodbye
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I hurt my back once.
I stopped exercising.
I got fat.
Then I waited.
I started exercising again.
My back so hurts.
Every day.
Each hour.
But I am no longer fat.