How To Deal With My Grief

i dont want your sighs and apologies
that fake voice you use when you think
youre being sympathetic
when really youre full of guilt because you
know you can only pretend to summon sorrow
and i dont want the long pause that follows almost
everything you say
‘and how are you doing’
you repeat like a broken record
tired therapist

i dont want your sympathy
i never have

if you care i want your hands at my back
and your smiles in my face
your money where your mouth is
proof that you care
no facades
‘i texted you one time and you never thanked me
for being there’
because your footsteps really only
lingered for a moment before you walked away

we are not your charity case
we are not your sob story
we are warriors
heroes in a battle against self
and as our indeterminate future looms
the last thing i need is your false empathy


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