I Bleed, You Bleed and We Bleed the Same (Unfortunately)

did you know that when you cut yourself
i bleed?
that the droplets of blood form droplets of blood red tears
and everything burns because your pain is projected
ten fold
i cant breathe and i hope
i pray
youre not struggling for air

one time
a face asked me loudly
WHY DO YOU CARE ABOUT HIM WHY WHY WHY
there really were a lot of why’s
my power of exaggeration is gone
i want to write better songs about you
but all my poetry is so ugly

i screamed nothing
the words are incapable of showing off the indelible feelings
the
stomach crushing
heart tearing realizations that somehow
when we were sleeping i sewed my soul to yours
and no
our souls never matched perfectly but we fit together

you move and i move too
only slightly more because im always trying to catch up
and that voice in my head that face
it screams louder it wants to know WHY WHY WHY
i cant let it go
let him go
let it all go but
i cannot reconcile that letting him go would be
letting
myself go and starting over
i am not good at starting over i am not good at questions with no answers
i am only good at empty sheets of paper
and scribbled out answers to the question
WHO DO YOU WANT TO BE
and anything that ends in why

because decision and decisive ridicules me as much as
3 a.m. ridicules me
it spits in my face it has a demonized version of a laugh
it hurls its insults
it spits some more and i just think about sleeping
and falling asleep and the cycle continues as the face in my head screams
questions and my head scribbles out answers
you shift and i shift and nothing needs to make sense
things just need to end
in concluding sentences and periods

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One thought on “I Bleed, You Bleed and We Bleed the Same (Unfortunately)

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