Last Time

i can feel my fingers breaking as i stop myself from reaching out to you
i will bite my tongue until it bleeds before i tell you
that this is not working
the guise of friendship is not strong enough
the bonds of shared laughs and memories
of moments that were perfect
the bonds of spewed fears and sadness
are strong but not strong enough for me to say
that everything is perfect

you twist your words more beautifully than i ever thought lies could sound
why did i ever tell you the things that plague my mind
maybe a think tongue and a fuzzy mind are not good things
maybe plastic happiness melts too easily because it is too cheaply made
to easy to secure but to never check
i need my plastic heart but i cannot rely on yours

this is the last time i dedicate words to the unnamed you that i know
who is you
so clearly
because i am sad and sometimes it hurts to breathe
and i want this to work but i cannot fathom how it could
so this is it
my goodbye

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