Words I Should Say, Series #5

somewhere in the youngest years of my life
i wanted to fashion myself
into the image you would want
to have as a part of your life
and i failed
because how can we read the minds of the people
we love if
we cant even begin to understand them
and ill probably never know
how everything became so disjointed
how your approval drives me
because youve never given it
and ive never asked
but would screaming
accomplish anything except driving ourselves
in further directions
even farther than we’ve already
pushed ourselves to be
and i cant decide
if im still working for you to
think of me as something better
or if im
trying to be something
entirely independent of
because you were supposed to be
a constant and
i could never ask you for that
but i could tell you that someday i
hope we end up on the same
in the same place


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