This is Real Life

I don’t know what I’m afraid of. 
Except when I think of time spent
you and I
I think of my unmade up face
of how sleepiness plagues my eyes
and stress plagues my being
and how my lips look funny when they talk. 
When I think of time spent 
you and I 
I think of times when I stumbled over the words
I wanted to say and didn’t
or the jokes you made that I didn’t laugh at
because I didn’t want to seem too eager, too desperate. 
When I think of time spent
you and I
I think of all the ways I let myself down
and all my awkwardness
ugliness,
corniness, 
manifesting itself into the person in your eyes. 
I cringe,
realizing, 
it’s not you I’m having trouble accepting into my life, 
it’s me. 

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One thought on “This is Real Life

  1. U is for Unashamed | After the Ecstasy, the Laundry . . .

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