He Was Not You

He smiles and I try to, but his smile is not yours.
He is not you. 
I made him laugh but I didn’t mean to. 
He says I’m smart because I do well in school, 
I think I’m stupid because I 
keep looking, waiting
for something that isn’t happening. 
He holds my hand as we sit, he’s
casually nice and caustically happy
but
I cannot 
              feel
anything right because he is not you.

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One thought on “He Was Not You

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